Good morning, sunshines!

It is a beautiful day in my neighborhood; how about yours?

I just read the last lines of the last post
and my chest felt like fabric in an angry fist.
I had a great weekend, though and life moves haltingly forward.

The India Fest was pretty cool--a little slow-moving for my kids,
but the dancers captivated them and the fireworks were lovely.
I enjoyed the food, they enjoyed the llamas.
There was a sliver of a moon, shining deep red as I stood on the terrace of the temple and looked out over the mountain-hugged valley.
They couldn't have chosen a more serene and breathtaking location for their home.
I have some pictures to add later.
Most of the pictures turned out like heaping piles of llama manure (Llamanure, for short) so this is all I have for ya:

Lovely building, isn't it?

Today I am home from school with a sick child.
Poor little sweet.

I think that tomorrow when I see my most awesome counselor I will ask him how
in the bloody hell
I'm supposed to know when I should have what I want and when I shouldn't have it.
So many conflicting desires.
It's like there are two of me, and each of us wants something different.
And, sadly, the two self's desires are mutually exclusive.

But, like I said, the world still spins and the sun still shines and,
with thrilling fortuity, the lightening still crashes.
I've often tried to hold the sea
the sun, the fields, the tide
But somehow they all slip through my fingers like grains of sand.

See...the problem with me having a blog right now is that I am so afraid of being myself that I can't think of anything to say most of the time.

Maybe I'll go make a pumpkin pie or some pumpkin bread for little pumpkin-loving punkin'.
And hopefully he'll wake up and want to watch movies in my room at some point, cuz what's the good of having a sick kid if you can't even snuggle them and be LAZY??

Just lemmee get my homework finished and that pumpkin-whatever made and I'll be ready for some moooo-vies! Woot!

Hope you all are happy to see another Monday in the mirror.

****Update****

2:33pm

I promised myself I wouldn't so much as peek,
but I did,
because, well, I'm weak
(and comma-prone, which is not so tragic as coma-prone, but I digress)
and I did, I peeked.
(Which is also far less tragic than peaking, if we're referring to sexual peak or career peak or widow's peak...ahem!)
The point is, I cried my little hazel eyes out but they were tears of joy, at least mostly joy, and just overall unleashing of pent-up emotions and why is this so fucking difficult for me???
Because friends like that don't grow on trees, man, that's why.
They don't even grow on bushes,
(although the sight of a bush might make them Grow--
but that's a different story.)
The point is, friends like that are rare in this ugly, barren world and maybe I could be less of a drama queen now and then, cuz frankly I couldn't be MORE of one--the laws of physics don't allow for it!

So, to sum up:
1. I'm a weak peeker
2. I'm a peak wrecker
3. turn down the drama, mama
4. this was supposed to be poetic but my brain couldn't sit still!

I want to hunt a unicorn
through a forest, in a daze,
Wanna ride a sea-horse fast
into spray, where spirits graze;
I'd like a watching saucer to reveal itself to me,
I'd like to crawl into a bottle
and drift back out to sea.
--Author Unknown(ish)


(I'm all red cuz I was in the bath when I took that shot, many years ago.)