Sunday, October 21, 2007

Life is a dance; I think I'll lead...

It has been 26 days since I stepped out of my life and into this Brave New World.
26 days since I was sheltered and pampered and dictated to.

I have made this house my home, more than it ever was when first I lived here, 7 years ago.
It was a caterpillar, and now it's a butterfly, like me.
I have fallen in love with this house, and fallen in love in it.
Here I am...
hurtling toward divorce at the speed of light--
(or life, or love, or flight!)
And I am happier than I've been in years.
That life wasn't mine...
I didn't own it, it owned me.

I know I'm not the first person to go through divorce,
but it still feels new to me, and unique.
We are handling this very differently than most.
Whenever I catch myself wondering why I'm not grieving the loss of this union I remember two things:
1. I grieved plenty this summer
2. This is what I've wanted for YEARS
I am settling into this new world, but it's still new and being new it is scary.
There are so many possibilities and I love that feeling, but--
it can also be very overwhelming.

Can I believe my luck at having met B when I did?
Nope.
I keep wondering if he's real...
So far, all signs point to yes.

My new views, my mountains--


I love the way they catch the light and reflect it.



I also love the way the setting sun casts a shadow that creeps up the mountain as the light transforms them from lumps of grey rock to kaleidescopes of Life...
Happy Monday to you all!

13 comments:

Bud said...

The opening pages of this new chapter have been most satisfying to read.

Itchy said...

Oh I wish I had a view like that...beautiful.

leen said...

it is sooo good to read of the many changes, the new path to happiness. makes me smile for you.

Becky..Absent Minded Housewife said...

Heh, I know that mountain...

d-man said...

I want to go live on a mountain. Like Buddha. Or some other kind of crazy fool.

d-man said...

And reflect from the mountain, so all souls can see it...

Lisa said...

I think I feel a song coming on, d-man! :) I would also recommend this mountain for you to run away to. It's very conveniently located...

Why yes, you do, BeckySue! (Sorry, just a term of endearment...and it rhymed!!) When are you folks gonna be in my neck of the woods again, huh??

Thank you so much, sweet Leen!

Yeah...it's truly uplifting to the soul, Itchy! Better than church...

That just makes me grin, Bud--grin out loud!

Thomas said...

You have started a new path with the last still clinging to your shoes. Tred carefully so that you take with you everything you want without the undesirable debris marring your journey.

By the way,

Nice tits.

Lisa said...

Are you blogging these days, Thomas? Nice to see you, especially showing such restraint! I'm very proud of you. :)

Thomas said...

An ever watchful corporate structure prevents me from using AIM and Vox, rendering me into a mostly lurking spectator.

And if you wanted me to show you my restraints, you'd see they're lined with faux fur.

Lisa said...

Har, har, thomas! And I understand the limitations of a working man in a blogger's world. Still, it's nice to see you. And I always preferred the restrained side of you, anyway! :)

Becky..Absent Minded Housewife said...

Probably not until Thanksgiving...though my fam-damily that lives on the base of that mountain (on their compound) is coming out to see us the first week of November. My sister and I have birthdays then...and I think my BIL wants to get drunk.

Lisa said...

'dover is a great place to get drunk without your bishop knowing!! snort. Well, maybe during Turkey week we could get together...